Recently, I was finally getting back on the up and up with my own debt situation. Things were going good and then it happened; the water pump went out on my Chevy Tahoe. The cost: 300 bucks.
‘Okay’, I thought, ‘I can live with that’, then the next incident happened. The garage door got dinged up and needed some work done. The cost: 100 bucks.
Then, as if that weren’t enough, we had another incident and we needed another 100 bucks to pay for that. At this point, I was hoping these incidents only came in threes.
With all of those events going on one right after the other it can be hard to save up money, pay off debt, and keep myself focused all at the same time. After all, I just spent an extra $500 to pay for things that came up unexpectedly that month. I could only take so much.
After facing that little bump in the road, I did everything I could to stay focused and move on, and I did. In this post, I will show you how I stayed focused and a little trick I use to get myself back on track when I don’t feel like sticking to the plan.
Why Your Mindset Doesn’t Stay Focused
Before we talk about why we can’t stay focused it may be a little easier to answer the question of how we stay focused. Staying focused is actually very simple. Focus is nothing more than habits we live by.
The best way I can illustrate this to you is with an example. I know a few people who were going through a weight loss class. Every week they would attend the class and were taught everything from better eating habits to exercise.
The class for them was a success. Over a period of time, they achieved their optimal weight and were very happy with the results. After attending the classes for a while, however, they became increasingly bored and decided that they could save more money if they quit.
So they did, but can you figure out what happened once they quit? Yup, you guessed it, they gained the weight back. And why do you think they gained the weight back?
They broke the cardinal rule, they stopped doing the things which led them to success. They broke the habits that got them to their ideal weight. Could they have lived without the weight loss program? Sure, but they got bored. Once they got what they wanted and accomplished their goal, sticking to their habits didn’t matter anymore.
Habits Keep You Focused
Without a strong backing of habits you won’t stay focused. It’s just that simple. If you want to get out of debt, you’ve got to have more than determination. You’ve got to have two things.
- A Strong WHY. Your why is the reason that you want to change. For example, in the weight loss example, the people who lost the weight may have wanted to achieve the same goal but their reasons may have been totally different. Their ‘whys’ may have included wanting to fit into an old dress size, or it may have been because it makes them feel successful.
- Strong Habits In Place. Without strong habits, success may almost be impossible to achieve. Habits are what bind us to the results that we get in life.
I’ve known people who try to change habits willfully and see this blow up in their face time and time again. Recently, I was at work and one of my co-workers told me of his plans to quit smoking.
Out of nowhere he decided this. I then proceeded to ask him ‘why’ he wanted to quit. He said it was getting too expensive to smoke. He then proceeded to crumble up his cigarettes and throw them away.
I looked at him and said, ‘you won’t quit’. This guy looked at me stunned that I didn’t believe him. As soon as I said that, the guy promised he would quit. In fact, he bet me a buck that he would quit cold turkey.
A couple of months later, I was working and happened to see the guy smoking again. I approached him and asked why he didn’t quit smoking. He just shrugged it off and walked away. I also reminded him he owed me a buck because he didn’t keep the bet.
The problem with this guy was that his ‘WHY’ wasn’t big enough. He wanted to quit ‘just because’. Well guess what, quitting ‘just because’ isn’t good enough. Your belief has to be an emotional feeling. Now if the guy wanted to quit to avoid getting lung cancer, that would be a big ‘why’.
How Big Is Your Why
In order to justify a reason to make a habit change such as getting out of debt, your ‘why’ needs to be something personal and very emotional. If you can’t get yourself motivated to do so, your ‘why’ isn’t big enough.
So what should your ‘why’ be? Well, what motivates you? Is it traveling, your family, or something else? Whatever it is, it needs to be something you believe in.
For example, one of my ‘whys’ is financial independence. This is something I think about constantly. However, that isn’t my only ‘why’. I actually have several big ‘whys’. These reasons keep me focused and motivated toward my goal.
So take some time now and write out what your ‘whys’ are. What gets you motivated. When I was in financial services, one of the first things they made us do was write out our ‘whys’. So take time now.
How To Get Motivated When You Feel Lazy
I know when I talk about getting out of debt you may have that question of where to start. You may feel a little frustrated, lazy, or just downright don’t care.
I am going to share with you a little tip I use to keep myself motivated and focused. There are actually 3 ways to change your motivation.
- Emotional
- Physical
- Mental
Here’s the secret though, if you can change any one of these situations then you can change them all. For example, if you are feeling frustrated with trying to get out of debt because it seems to keep piling up, and as a result, you are mentally strained, physically given up, and your emotions are just out of whack.
Again, if you can change just one of these areas emotional, physical, or mental, you can change all of them. What I like to do is simply change my physical condition. Now you can change your emotional and mental condition but I find changing your physical condition to be the easiest.
So what I might do if I am mentally strained and my emotions are on the fritz is do something different, like take a walk, call a friend or play my guitar. Anything besides worrying about the situation at hand. This way, my mind has the chance to reset itself and my emotions have a chance to calm down, so when I do go back to deal with the problem, I will feel up to it.
Emotions vs. Logic
Have you ever said something you didn’t really mean? I know I have. At times, when your emotions are all wound up or you are upset about something, your emotions may tend to get the best of you. You may say things that you don’t necessarily mean.
Then there is the logic part of the equation. When you are thinking logically, you are thinking clearly about things. However, the problem is when we are feeling like we are at the end of our rope, we tend to overreact to things that really aren’t that bad.
Have you ever wonder why that happens?
It’s because when emotions are high, the logical part of your thinking is low. Conversely, if your logic is high your emotions are low. So in layman’s terms when emotions are high, our intelligence is generally lower.
Now, if you can change any one of these situations you can change all three. In most cases, I like to change my physical condition because for me that seems be the easiest. So what I might do in this case is go for a jog or take a shower.
By doing this, I am changing my physical situation which will allow me to get my mind off things and give my emotions a chance to settle. However, if I’m frustrated and try to dig further into the situation I would only dig a deeper hole for myself.
Learning to change your physical behavior in states of peak emotions will allow you to think more logically and rationally. So next time you are feeling frustrated, try the tips I have given you above and leave a comment to let me know how it worked out.
Chris
This article was featured in The Carnival Of Personal Finance By Wide Open Wallet.